“Violations can be used as an opportunity towards personal growth and leadership.”

When we think of a “betrayal,” we often think of an earth-shattering, personally-devastating, stabbed-in-the-back sort of deception. But betrayals come in all shapes and sizes. And failure to acknowledge and deal with the “little betrayals”—such as routine gossip at the water-cooler—can have a huge effect on the state of trust in our organizations. In this episode, Kari and Paul discuss how to spot these minor betrayals, and how to deal with them early on and effectively.

In This Episode:

1:16 — Major vs. minor betrayals

2:39 — How to identify minor violations

3:42 — The “four boxes” of betrayal

6:17 — An example of a minor betrayal

8:00 — Gossip as a minor betrayal

11:17 — Breaking the cycle of distrust by dealing with violations

13:03 — How to start engaging with violations

14:38 — The value of identifying betrayals

14:55 — Authentic trust and betrayals

15:28 — Dealing with the victim mindset

Quotes:

“Minor betrayals accumulate. Most of us don’t address them in the moment as a violation of trust because they’re minor, and we don’t want to make a big deal about it. Over time, though, they grow bigger than the actual event. And the cumulative weight of all of these minor violations that has them transform into a major violation.” 

“Whenever you gossip about a person, it leaves the person you are gossiping to with a diminished sense of the person you are gossiping about.” 

“One of the most powerful skills for a leader to have is the ability to overcome violations of trust—whether coming at them or sourced from them. And the first step is to be able to recognize those violations in the first place.” 

“Violations can be used as an opportunity towards personal growth and leadership.” 

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Links:

Kari’s Website

Paul’s Website

Contact The Granger Network

Paul’s Other Podcast: Your Business Your Wealth 

LEADERSHIP IMPACT PODCAST

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Acknowledgements:
Our work is mosaic art. We read, study, and practice many philosophies, methodologies, and modalities of human performance, to ensure that our approach best serves our clients. We would like to acknowledge all of the thought leaders and organizations, whose ground-breaking work has influenced the TGN Consulting approach – especially Fernando Flores, Jim Selman, Michael C. Jensen, Julio Olalla, Pluralistic Networks, The Newfield Network, and the Strozzi Institute.

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